The Book of Rules
by dancer in the mist
Summary: Retelling of a popular tale, with elements of satire.


THE BOOK OF RULES  
  
a story  
  
Once upon a time there lived a king who had two sons. When he grew too old, the counselors decided that, according to the old rule, the older brother would take the throne. The younger one, David, who was born barely a year after his brother, fell into despair because he wished from all his heart to become a king, and he had spent the past years with only this on his mind. All his attempts to make the king and his counselors change their minds failed. Thus, David, in his anger, raised his voice, cursing the ancient rule. Then, the counselors, along with his father, found no better punishment against this blasphemy than for the prodigal son to be banished from the royal castle. The older brother, who didn't necessarily wish to be a king, would have gladly given David the right to inherit the throne, knowing his desire to reign, but he also knew the power of the old rule, which he respected and didn't dare stand against.  
David departed from the royal castle the next day at dawn. Fury grew inside his heart as he left behind the place from where he was unfairly banished. He walked for two days, on the road, but on the third day, a thick forest cut his way. After he gave it a little thought, David decided not to divert from his course and entered the wood. After some time spent wandering around, he realized he was lost and as he went further, he was losing himself even more in the bottomless thicket. He immediately thought his life had spent and he started yelling from the bottom of his lungs: "Hey, people! Nobody around here??" Only the birds and small animals from the bushes answered him. After a night spent in agony, freezing and hungry ('cause his food had finished) and afraid of the wild animals - he heard a human voice. It was a woodsman, calling his dog. Hopeful, David went to him and, hiding his true origin, spoke: "Good day to you, woodsman! I am a traveler tired and hungry, who has lost his way in this endless thicket. Be good and feed me, then look to guide me out of this forest."  
"Good day to you, too", the woodsman answered. "Thou have spoken righteously, no man can seek refuge in this woods until he knows its most hidden places, in no way an unknowing traveler. But since you're here, come to my hut where you will find shelter and food, and when you feel quite yourself again, I will take you to the end of the forest."  
David thanked him and followed him to his hut. There he received food enough to put him back on his feet, and a warm bed to rest in, because the woodsman was a well-meaning man, though he may have seemed severe. There, David also met the woodsman's daughter, and as soon as he saw her he took a fancy on her. She had the sweetest most wonderful smile, long black hair, milky white skin and deep blue eyes. Noticing the piercing look with which the stranger searched his daughter, the woodsman said: "Take your mind off her, traveler. I don't give her to a nobody."  
David shut his mouth and swallowed, remembering that now he was a 'nobody', banished by his father, a renegade. And he started to build a plan in his mind, to get his revenge and at the same time win back his lost rights. Regaining his good disposition because of the evil thoughts roaming his mind, he tried to talk to the girl. : "What's your name?" he asked. "Catherine", she answered slowly. "Have you got a sweetheart around here?" "No," came the answer. "Would you like me to be then?" "I don't know...My father does not wish to." "If I come back rich, with jewelry to which you won't find pair in this kingdom, then will you give me Catherine?" David asked the woodsman. "Stop bragging, young man," the woodsman said, smiling a secret smile, "and do not wish for what you cannot have."  
The following morning, David left guided by the woodsman and arrived in short time in the open road. Following his plan, he returned to the royal castle and asked to see his father, whom he begged in his knees for mercy, asking the ancestors to be forgiven, and confessing that these days when he was gone he had been fasting and thinking, realizing in the end the sin he had committed, by scorning the ancient rules. "Now I'm back", David ended, "desiring nothing but a word of forgiveness and consolation." His father, rejoicing in seeing him back on the right path, hugged him and organized a great party that lasted for three days in a row. On the fourth day, David invited his older brother to hunt together, saying that all is forgiven and forgotten. The king approved to it gladly and the two of them left. David took his brother in that bottomless forest, and being careful not to lose his way himself, was secretly marking the trees near which they passed. When he decided they sunk deeply enough in the forest, David shot his brother and, covering him with branches, returned quickly to the royal castle. Before going in, he tore off his clothes, scratching his face and arms, and then he entered the throne room screaming insanely: "Oh, Great Lord! Oh, father! My beloved brother!" "My boy!" the king voiced, astonished and worried. "What is with you?" Why are your clothes torn and bloody? And where is your brother, my son?" "Oh, father, beasts have torn him to pieces! He's dead, oh, father! I tried to pull him from their sharp claws but I was injured as well, escaping thus by foot." Hearing these words, the king felt his own end was near, he leaned against his diamond throne and fell ill.  
By the old laws, if the older brother were to die before he became a king, the younger one followed to the throne in his place. So, everybody was getting prepared for the coronation, and David was very very happy. His father, the king, died soon afterwards and the second day after the funeral, David was to be crowned. That day, he left for the woodsman's hut in the carriage drawn by his most quick horses. The woodsman sat alone at a table and was just having dinner. Recognizing David, he invited him to take a seat beside him. But he spoke: "I made a promise and here I am! I came to thee with the most praised fortunes. That carriage outside your hut has no pair in the whole kingdom. Come see for yourself. Catherine will be mine." That moment, Catherine appeared from the other room and said to David: "Sir, I do not know of your fortunes, nor do I wish to. But my heart is given and I hope you do not desire to take me by force. I will marry nobody but the one who holds the key to my heart!" At which David responded: "Ha! Who asked you?" And turned to the woodsman to receive his approval. But the woodsman spoke the following words: "You heard my daughter! Well, learn that I do not and cannot go over her will! She's my only daughter and I wish to make her happy. If you came here with good thoughts, please sit down and have dinner with us, but if not, ''tis better for you to go." The woodsman whistled for his dogs that immediately approached, showing their fangs. David had to back away for the time, but not before swearing that he would pay for his insubordination.  
The third day after this happening, the new king, David, sent soldiers to the woodsman's hut to bring him to the royal castle in chains, and Catherine too, in his most expensive carriage. His orders were executed and on that same day, in front of David were brought Catherine, the woodsman, and another man, whose face was covered by the hair which fell from his forehead. "Who is this man?" David asked. The soldiers answered: "We don't know, we found him in the hut along with the woodsman and his daughter." " Brush his hair away, I wish to see his face," David ordered. The soldiers did just that but as soon as the stranger's face was uncovered, David froze. It was his brother, whom he thought dead!  
The counselors were silent, waiting for an explanation. Watching David with angry darkened eyes, the older brother spoke: "I left hunting with this brother of mine, after he assured me of his good intentions, and his wish to do penance. We walked for a long while in a forest that seemed to get darker and darker and when we sank deep enough in the gloomy woods, this son of a bitch shot me like a rascal in the back, covering me with branches. He probably thought I was dead for he departed in guilty haste leaving me there. I was deeply wounded and I suffered a great deal, so I couldn't rise to my feet. I lost consciousness but when I opened my eyes I thought I had died and gone to heaven: I was lying in a white bed and this beautiful girl – he pointed towards Catherine – was tending to my wound. I showed my gratitude in the most carefully chosen words, thanking her for the care she showed me and praising her. I also met her father, a very honest and dignified man who is now standing here chained, as unfairly chained as I am, serving the desires of an unjust king. Catherine took care of me in the course of long days and I felt how my gratitude changes into love; she confessed to me that she feels the same way. And now I learn that David, who not only stole my kingdom, killed my father (for he died in grief, hearing of my death), and wished to kill me-; now he also wants to take Catherine away from me. Is this justice?" he screamed, turning towards the counselors.  
The oldest counselor, whom everybody listened to and came to for advice, who could order kings as well, because of his wisdom (but who couldn't himself speak against the ancient laws), voiced: "Free these men! They do not deserve chains: for one is a king's son and the other, an honest man. Now... a difficult burden lies on my shoulders as I am now called upon to put right where once had been put wrong. We have learned today, in amazement and shock that the dead king's older son is indeed very much alive and wishes to give us evidence of the fact by entering his dutiful rights, the throne..."  
"I do n..." "Silence, son! You may think you do not wish so, but the law does and your wish is to obey the law! You will reign us as a king, Your Majesty, but for this you must give up this worldly whim of yours to wed this maiden." "It's not a whim; it's Love!" the older brother dared. "Even so, thou cannot wed her. Royal blood asks for royal blood. I am afraid in this matter your brother, David, gains the day. He desires her as well, and he shall have her. And you will take back what was non righteously taken from you." "But..." David tried to protest, stunned. Things weren't working out quite the way he'd planned.  
His brother's thoughts matched David's exactly. "I'd rather not be a king and be instead with Catherine," he tried to compromise. "No, it's out of the question, Your Majesty!" the wise counselor raised his voice. "This is so ridiculous", the older brother said exasperated. "I suffered so much I wouldn't wish for my worst enemy to suffer: I witnessed my own brother betraying me and trying to kill me, my father died and I couldn't even attend his funeral, I struggled for days between life and death in horrifying pains, and now I can't even receive the peace I desire: the thing that cannot be denied to even the worst sinner: Love!" "We will love you, your Majesty!" "Not THAT kind of love!" "There are still lots of beautiful women in the world: The Princess of... is said to be charming." "Catherine is the one for me", he sighed. "There is really nothing I can do to make you change your mind?" "I'm afraid not, Your Majesty", the counselor replied. Till then, David stood still because he was too shocked, but given time to regain his voice, he muttered: "Man, this IS stupid". Then, aloud: "What does the ancient law say about my destiny?" "You will wed this maiden, as you desired, and give up your crown." "And where will I live?" "Anywhere but the Royal Palace." To tell the truth, David was much too happy to escape ALIVE and not even jailed, so when the old counselor spoke again: "You will also receive a quarter of this kingdom, as brother of the king";  
  
he thought he could really go with it. "But what of me? I do not wish to marry this man!!" Catherine said. "Woman, you should be grateful that the brother of a king desires to wed you", the counselor responded. "A criminal brother of a king!" she reminded him. "Nobody is perfect," the counselor ended in wisdom. "And this is the primary ancient saying that we must consider." He closed the Big Book he held open in front of him.  
THE END!  
  
"Biology tells us we're all dying. And the original sin tells me ain't nobody innocent" –Robert Patrick Modell  
"Yeah, some more innocent than others." – Fox William Mulder  
  
(PUSHER, THE X FILES) 


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